Thoughts and emotions are the strongest noise when we are conscious. Being alone with these is terrifying.
I am not good enough. This place is better off without me.
These are just some of the examples that mind is capable of producing, without any evidence. Insecurities, fears, experiences combined and exaggerated can create such without any effort.
Who does even bother to listen to these?
We can seek the comfort of others. Noise gets blurred, however it never goes away unless we learn to deal with it. We can receive guidance, and mostly likely should.
When it comes to the mind, it’s a jungle, we have to become the Tarzan.
The strongest predator in the jungle is no other than our own fears and cruelties we inflict upon ourselves. We are alone with this task, even though we might receive invaluable advice, guidance, mentorship from others.
The task is not to tame the wild, but to learn to live with it.
As a personal anecdote, I’ve had the two day party streak this weekend on top of weeks long work. This is rather unusual for me, yet very much needed. Summer time in Finland is wonderful and it needs to be lived to fully. We should throw at life all our energies and then some more. This is what separates man from the beast, the joy of living. It’s not only joy of party, but joy of work as well.
This morning then I reflect my two party nights and I’ve few regrets so far. Biggest regret is the things that we have not done and as far as the actions are aligned with the values they are likely to feel right.
In any case, I’ve noticed that it’s not really natural or easy for me to approach these situations without any anxiety. My mind is self-sabotaging all the time. It takes serious conscious reprogramming with situation by situation to feel alright.
Mostly my mind is my enemy. Although I cannot tell about other people, however since they do not give any signal that could interpret, I’ve to believe that it’s mostly just my internal thinking that sabotages my efforts.
“You need to learn how to select your thoughts just the same way you select your clothes every day. This is a power you can cultivate. If you want to control things in your life so bad, work on the mind. That’s the only thing you should be trying to control.” – Elizabeth Gilbert
I dislike hostile words that have to do with violence such as the enemy. However, in this case the mind is the enemy, the hostile saboteur or the friendly and punctual caretaker, gardener of our souls. We have to carefully choose which one we want to work for us. The trick is that, at first the gardener is novice, completely unskilled. We need to teach the mind the habits of greatness unless those are instilled upon us by friendly influences.