Lack of questions signals that there is no interest. When I understood this a few days ago I felt shocked as indeed it’s in many cases easier not to ask anything than it is to ask. Sometimes I’ve also passed asking questions even though I’ve been curious about something, however I still haven’t bothered to open up my mouth.
Often the questions are more valuable than the actual answers.
Questions show that we are thinking.
Questions show that we care.
Questions are essential for learning.
Questions connect people.
When you do not ask questions you are not moving towards people, you are drifting apart.
Asking questions means building understanding, building happiness, building love and all that good stuff.
Growth. Something in physical terms would mean to increase in size or mass. In emotional terms it would probably means mature response versus immature response. In spiritual terms, I don’t know. In intellectual terms it would perhaps mean better performance in a quiz or test.
Around 2007 I found the idea of conscious growth from Steve Pavlina’s blog and around 2009 I think I’ve been practicing daily.
Growth is always in relation to who are and where we want to be. We cannot compare ourselves to anyone else and we shouldn’t. Bill Gates would have said that comparing yourself to anyone else is an insult to yourself.
To grow then, we would need an understanding of our present state, to understand that we are but in the beginning of our journey.
To grow, we need to accept that we are all beginners. Masters are the masters at this skill, humility.
Humility opens up the mind for learning. So the way to grow is to start a fresh.
Yesterday’s decision making process put some interesting energy on the move. It’s the kind of energy where I remembered who I am and decided to live true to that.
We need to remember to be true to ourselves, and then we will find the energy to do the things that matter.
To be to oneself requires decision making based on self-understanding. Self-understanding requires listening and accepting that which is evident.
We get to be only ourselves in this life. Although what makes life fun is that we get to play many roles during our lifetimes. Still some roles fit us better than others and here the listening part comes crucial.
Listen, understand and say no to what isn’t you. Stay true to you.
Love yourself as you are. We need to love ourselves first, because not necessary there will be no-one else to do so either. We need to learn to be by ourselves first.
When we are able to with ourselves, it’s much easier to be with others and be of value to other.
Therefore remember to be true to yourself.
I used to get easily annoyed by almost anything. In fact word “self-help” itself was a bit red alert for me. Yet I felt like this is exactly the time I need to use this word that I’ve almost banned from my dictionary.
This is so fun topic: the signals that we need to find in order to help ourselves.
Helping ourselves is the second best option, right after the fact that there might be someone who is more qualified to see what we really need. Self-help is almost the best option!
How do we know that we need self-help? I think understanding that we need to help ourselves and to accept this are the most difficult parts. Who would like to admit that they are insufficient? Who would, because we are not!
In fact we are masterpieces in construction and never to be completed. Life is an oscillation rather than linear start and finish point. However, it’s each day we must wake up and start to chisel at our masterpieces.
Have you ever wondered how do the masters know that their masterpieces are ready? I think there are several unfinished masterpieces of art out there in the exhibition.
In the same way, ourselves we are an unfinished masterpiece which we must ourselves work on each day. This is why we need self-help: it’s part of the cure, not the only cure. Rest of the cure comes from those who can see what we really need.
Good way to know if you need some self-help is that if you do not get any help from outside. So then you might need to help yourself a bit, so you can receive a bit from outside 😀
Have a great day!
We do not have anything more than the present. We do not have our past and certainly not our future.
Suffering is created by clinging either to the past or the future.
If we go to past or the future we are distancing ourselves from the present. This in turn creates a vicious cycle of suffering, because if we are going to past or the future, we will lose present again.
All that we have is now, the present. Present includes everything. Buddha understood this very well and he also understood about the thinking and action which leads to these results.
In addition to the present, our present mindfulness or our thinking is all that we have. In fact we are not our thinking, because we can observe our thinking. Yet only few of us consciously exercise this human superpower called ‘thinking critically what we are thinking.’
We shouldn’t let our thinking taint our present experience, because present is all that we have. We should come to accept what we have and be happy with that 🙂
Not all work is equal. I.e. you could do spend the time doing the same thing. Or you could spend few hours to teach someone else to do the work and then continue teaching the next one.
Soon we have a multiplying effect.
What if you then would teach others to teach to teach? That effect would again be manifold to the previous one and many hundred times more effective than the first approach.
I noticed that it does take courage and win-win-win thinking to actually do what is right. Yesterday I had to make a stand by saying no and then understanding and teaching.
Gandhi taught millions or even billions of people to operate differently in new way, which was based on values, truth and courage.
Where are the multiplying chances in your life?
When it comes to reading or learning anything worthwhile, repetition is underappreciated. Common arguments go like “why bother learning anything at all because you can Google it.”
Well certainly you can Google, however you are just relying on outer source of information which may or may not be available. Another thing is that you are just processing information, you lose wholly the ability to understand deeply and synthetize deeply on based on this and other knowledge you have.
To simply put, that which you do not know and remember are not in the domain of your thinking, you cannot use it very well.
Simple way to get more knowledge, is to read more. And then read again after sometime, in order to understand what you have read even more deeply and from other perspectives.
After each reading time it’s good to have some key takeaways and put them in to action. And when you read it the next time you are more proficient in everything the book discusses and you can dive deeper.
When you repeat the repetition eventually you become the master, you could write it on your own, because you have done as you preach so long.
If we become what we do and we do what we think, then if we ought to become something we ought to think more along the lines what we ought to become.
To put it more simply: if we want to acquire a quality, we should also improve the quality of our thoughts.
Better outcomes rarely come by coincidence, therefore studying others who have already achieved what you want to achieve is a good place to start. More specifically it could be useful not only study those who have achieved what we want, but also to study their ways of thinking, their thought processes to understand what exactly they are thinking with actions they are taking.
Deeper understanding opens up the ways of thinking, and therefore the ways of becoming.
Enthusiasm can be rediscovered. It means you can get enthusiastic about something that you have been doing for a year, a two or decade.
I am beginning to suspect that enthusiasm is a sort of skill even.
Often in my work I meet people who get bored of the task within a week, month or a year. While this is natural and understandable, I am also amazed how much people are in the convinced belief that they do not have anything anymore to learn about the task.
Mastery comes through pushing the layers of resistance and rediscovering enthusiasm. Learning to look at the ‘familiar’ activity for example through different perspectives (like six thinking hats) is key here.
Enthusiasm is a form of curiosity and how it is connected to everything else, a skill to see and always look again with fresh eyes.
The problem of the box is that it assumes we know everything about ourselves and our surroundings. We cannot. We barely even know ourselves. Yet we attempt to place ourselves and others into these boxes. We even cannot measure our minds, so what are we to set any limits?
We can measure the kilocalories in our food, but we do not very well understand all the systemic effects on individuals of the food we eat. Each one of us is rather unique superorganism which is made much more than just our bodies. One third of our bodies is in fact bacteria populations, which are again rather unique.
Boxes, also known as limits are descriptive language, which useful is in existing incrementally the present. However, we must be prepared to discard and challenge these boxes at each turn. They are attempting to describe something that perhaps cannot even be described by words alone.