Before you answer, let me define stress first. As I looked up definitions of stress in first few online dictionaries they didn’t seem right. Fourth choice on Merriam-Webster seems to describe stress in the context I am talking about: “a state resulting from a stress; especially: one of bodily or mental tension resulting from factors that tend to alter an existent equilibrium <job-related stress>.”
So stress is something that comes from outside, to alter existing equilibrium or balance, as simple as that. When I was looking up the many of the other definitions of stress, I am not surprised people are suffering from stress, because if they are operating with that kind of definitions.
With this definition, stress is merely something that comes and it is our own choice to choose how we react. This is definition is in harmony with the circle of control – thinking I’ve been writing about, so we may choose our stress response.
If you now, suddenly get rushed by surge of internal excuses by your inner voice, write all of it down, on a paper, word or any other noting tool of a choice. By writing down your internal dialogue, when faced with a “novel” idea, you’ll start to process your internal resistance and just by doing that you’ll be able to uncover the path which allows you to get ahead in life.
Alright, so we may choose our stress response. Why don’t we and what does prevent us from doing that? We may choose our response, however that action takes place after the feeling of our emotions, unless we are in charge of our emotions: i.e. unless we can feel the emotion through and let it go, we cannot choose the response. To put it in other words: if we let emotion or feeling take over and act upon the impulse without thinking, we are not choosing, we are reacting.
On the other hand, if we have put considerable thought and training into our lives and life situations, we are able to effortlessly act on the right stress responses. Yes, I mentioned training, because we can train on the proper stress responses, and through training the proper responses become automatic and effortless. During first time, the proper conscious response takes a lot of effort in compared to responding impulsively. Therefore, if we think that we can consciously modify or change our responses to all stressors, we are wrong: our mental energy is limited, and if we have poor stress responses, our capacity to maximize our mental energy is also less than optimal.
Be in the game of optimizing your stress response for the long run, for all the good things happen through persistent training. With right habits, good things are guaranteed to happen and they keep on happening.