In recent months and years of my life, I’ve not felt the suffering as I did today in the morning. I felt quite sure about that I was going to fail and that did not feel so good.
Now in my evening reflection, I don’t think failure is anything to be ashamed of. Failure will happen to anyone, as long as you keep adding challenge until you reach a breaking point. “Last straw to break camel’s back” – indeed.
Avoiding failure, is not an option. Facing failure is inevitable on the path of growth.
We can control our inner world thought, even times of failure we can choose our response.
Even when everything else collapses, you are still fine, you can still breathe and move.
This morning was quite a different one for me, a sort of routine breaker, because I had forgotten go to shop previous day and now I did not have my usual breakfast sandwich or any bread which I am quite accustomed to eat in the morning. My morning schedule is tight, but I decide to turn it around with some porridge and blueberries, making the negative result into a very positive and I do succeed in this. Making it on time to my usual metro is considered success.
During my commute, this time I chose not to read, but to meditate. In my list of priorities, meditation is probably number one. Number one means that when I am troubled, that’s the first thing I do and this morning I certainly felt the trouble. Taking a few deep breaths already changes the mood, however biggest insight happens to me when I go through the noble eightfold path in my head. I understand that how little I understand of these precepts and especially about the three last ones: right effort, mindfulness and meditation.
I decide to read more online about these and I am right, there is so much to be learned. Perhaps the greatest lesson for me this time was that the noble eightfold path is not an order, but a wheel (like it’s represented often). As it’s a wheel, it means there is no order, but each pay equally important role in picture of whole.
Everything is connected.